Looking at all my friends’ photos on FaceBook late New Years Eve, I realized I wasn’t invited to any of their gatherings.
(If you’re my friend and reading this, don’t worry, I’m not hurt and this isn’t a knock on you. Read on.)
My brain immediately went to work on why: They don’t like me, I’m a bad friend, maybe I’m too chatty/obnoxious/single, they don’t see me as one of them, I’m not sophisticated enough/fun enough/polished enough/good enough to be invited.
Ever been there? No? Just me? Ok, well read on, anyway.
Self-coaching – thank God – is something I’ve become a master at practicing daily, and this gave me a great chance to coach myself.
Brain, I said to my brain, calm it down and back it up.
Let’s make some decisions, here.
I love my friends – the ones I know well, and the ones I’ve recently met – I love them all deeply.
And when I love someone deeply, I rejoice in their joyful moments, in their happiness.
And here were some pictures of some friends having a happy, joyful moment.
And I chose to rejoice.
Rejoice that God blessed me with people who can enjoy each other, instead of being in conflict.
Rejoice that God blessed them with a much-needed moment of happiness and peace and community.
Rejoice that God blessed all of us with exactly what we needed in that moment (as He always does).
They needed to gather without me – and I needed to learn that I don’t always have to be invited.
In fact, not being invited, is an opportunity for me to remind my brain that it has nothing to do with me, my worthiness, or even my character.
And isn’t that always the case?
It really is, very, very rarely, about us.
They love me. I love them.
And I rejoice in that, always.